National Siblings Day

Thanks to Jodi at Reimer Reason for enlightening us all about the fact that it's National Siblings Day today. What a great group of people to honour for, at the very least, one day a year.

I remember the day my three kids became these kind of special siblings. As I dealt with my own shock and panic on that first day I can remember the little narrative my brain was having with itself. I vaguely remember a small voice inside my head postulating about the fact that "this is gonna get way worse". I paid very little attention to it as I was otherwise busy with my own despair and bewilderment. What seemed like a little distraction to my troubles became louder and more evident as the day went on until finally I realized what it was saying. "What are you going to tell the kids!?". That started another wave of panic because I had no reasonable answer at the moment. As an aside, the thought of telling the people closest to you that your child was born with DS seems like the most daunting task because up until the moment you do there can still be the chance for disbelief or self-denial of the truth. In our experience we found that as we told people the better we felt about it.
So, what to tell the kids was something I had to figure out and approach with the common sense that had packed up and left post diagnosis and I was clinging to pure faith. All I could come up with was KISS, the "keep it simple sweetheart" slogan that once hung in one of my high school classrooms. Well, it was a start. So I decided to stick to the facts and handle the fallout as it happened. There was to be no tears or twisted faces from me as I didn't want the kids to think it was the end of the world because clearly it wasn't as the sun still came up that morning and the kids all called with happy excited voices. In the end, it was the kids way of dealing with it that inspired me. We told them and they digested for a moment, thinking through whatever it was they needed to process to understand what this meant for them and their new brother. Then the sensible questions came. Not many, but somewhat all encompassing ones like, what do you mean different and what is Down Syndrome? Olivia got very upset when we said Will would look a little different. To save a lot of explaining I found a picture of a little girl on the internet and showed it to her. She didn't think the girl looked all that different and her tears quickly dried. Knowing that their brother had DS did not even put a short detour in their journey to know and love their brother. They still all wanted to hold him or help change or bath him. They fully understand that Will has special needs and they are enthusiastically there fulfilling those needs. I took a few lessons from them in how to see past the diagnosis and see the person, the brother, the new baby boy.
I have stood back in amazement at seeing my older children become people I could never in my wildest dreams have imagined. It is not only my observations of their character that surprise me, but that of teachers, acquaintances and friends who share with me their impressions of three kids who carry a special knowledge and understanding. I am so proud of Mitchell, Olivia and Jack. Seeing them with their brother is usually seeing them at their best. They make the footsteps that Will is going to follow and I think they are aware of that. I don't think they are yet aware that they are making footsteps for many though, as they have become greater people because of their devotion to making life better for Will.

Image of Will and Olivia's footwear. Olivia was so happy to see I found some Crocs in Will's size. Matching footprints.